My Dad grew up in a spooky old house in England and believes in ghosts so much so that Mum wouldn’t let him tell us kids the tales in case we had nightmares. What she doesn’t know is that I’ve actually met a number of ghosts in my life. These ones aren’t the scary variety though, they are the very alive and well, male variety that just disappears and never texts or calls you back ever again, ghosting. I used to say they must have fallen off a cliff. Maybe even then I was thinking of the sea.
There was an “incredibly rare” sighting of a ghost fish in 2016! Ghost fish sighted Unfortunately when trying to hook a fish from the dating pool, ghost fish are not rare.
My first ghost was a guy that I had met about three times and we hit it off straight away. We met at a bar (in real life!) danced, drank, talked, and he text me back over a number of days, but then started to get a bit vague about his work in the Army. However we met up again and everything was great. Then it happened…. he didn’t text me back. I was young and niave, he didn’t even text back to the angry taunts. I just couldn’t understand what had happened. He literally disappeared! In time, I assumed he probably had a girlfriend and had never told me the truth. This was army ghost.
Three years later, army ghost turned up again! He was submarining.
Most recently, I met a fishing enthusiast ghost! We hit it off online and without any drama arranged to meet on a Thursday night at a local bar and had a great date for about an hour and a half. He said goodbye saying he had a good time and agreed we should meet up again. As he hadn’t eluded to any need to progress things quickly I simply gave him a hug and a peck on the cheek. Later, I messaged him my number. Strangely though, he messaged back online not through text and then told me he had a lot on this weekend with his brothers 30th.
It was the busiest time of his life.
Oh….that’s never a good sign. Sure enough I didn’t hear from him on my mobile number. A couple of messages went back and forth online with him still busy. Our last contact I tried to call him out. Simply put, “I don’t think you’ve been very truthful with me”. He disappeared forever without reply, possibly haunting other girls. I’ll never know.
But aren’t ghosts meant to hang around? I think a more accurate description is ‘disintegrating’. Rather than being in to you, they are dis-in to you. They are the opposite of being able to integrate into your life. And like a bad vampire movie, when they have to come into the sunlight they turn to ash and the ashes just float away on the wind.
Every guy I meet that I’m not into, don’t think it will work, or have something that’s come up, I speak openly and honestly.
“Nice to meet you but I don’t think there is a spark.” Or, “This isn’t what I’m looking for, all the best.”
Ghosting is such a cop out but they get away with poor communication and disrespect as there is no consequences. If I knew how to create a dating app, I would design it similar to Uber. You get a rating based on your treatment and journey with each other. Boy oh boy, the reviews would be an interesting read!
Greg ⭐️ smoked non stop
Kevin ⭐️ no eye contact
Luke ⭐️⭐️ clearly not over their ex
Mike 💩 tried to seduce me at 10:30am!
Matt 💩 is also talking online to my best friend
Dave ⭐️ turned up sweaty in his running gear after I had styled my hair so it would still look great in the winds at the beach!
All men 💩that couldn’t be bothered telling me he wasn’t that into me. Ghosted!
Let these relationships disintegrate.